Friday, December 9, 2011

The Limited Contact Rule - What If You Work Or Go To School With Your Ex?

This is a very popular question from those who are seeking to get an ex back and have to use the limited contact rule instead of the no contact rule. So what should you do and how should you act if you cannot simply disappear from your ex for awhile and have to see them regularly.

1. The best thing is not to ignore them, but don't actively seek them out either.

2. Another good thing is not to let them see you affected by the breakup. If you come across as bitter, they will know that they still have your affections. You do not want to appear miserable and push them further away from you.

3. Always be polite. If your ex happens to come up and talk to you, just be polite. Being rude will only show them that they got under your skin. Be happy and polite, but don't over do it. This will make them wonder a lot of things such as:
  • Why you're not distressed about the breakup.
  • If you've already moved on and seeing someone else.
  • Whether you really meant anything to them all.
Remember, the name of the game is to reverse the breakup. Appearing that the breakup for you was the best thing that could've happened will make them wonder.

4. Keep every interaction limited. Yes, it's called the limited contact rule for a reason. Don't latch on to each interaction like a puppy who was just waiting for your ex to show them attention. Keep each interaction pleasant but brief, and always be the one to end it.

5. Be busy. That's why you end each interaction, because you are busy and have a life other than appeasing your ex of scrambling for any ounce of attention they may give you. End each interaction with a pleasant statement like, "It was nice talking to you, but I have to go _______ (fill in the blank).

6. Limit the information you tell your ex. When you interact with your ex, be a bit mysterious. Don't let them know everything you're up to. Actually, if they ask you what you've been doing...give them a smart ass answer. Keep them in dark as much as possible about your private life.

The reason why I always say you're at a disadvantage when you have to use the limited contact rule as opposed to the no contact rule is because your ex can keep tabs on you, unlike no contact in which you can just disappear for a while. Limit yourself as much as possible during limited contact.

7. Start seeing someone else. This is pretty important when it concerns the limited contact rule. Like the no contact rule, you have to accept that your relationship with your ex is over for the time being. You have to start making steps to moving on.

Dating another person has more to do with helping you to move on and getting your confidence back than making your ex jealous. Remember, much like no contact, limited contact is about you and healing from the breakup.

8. Also like no contact, the limited contact rule is only a tool or stage within a complete strategy on how to get an ex back. IT IS NOT THE ENTIRE STRATEGY! Most people go wrong here and think that no contact or limited contact is the complete strategy when it's not.

Not having a proven strategy will decrease your chances in any aspect of life, especially in trying to get an ex back. Get a proven plan before attempting to get them back. Trust me, you'll avoid a lot of mistakes that could damage your chances of ever getting them back. Click the link to see the best books on getting an ex back that I've personally used.

If you've come across this post and don't know whether you should use the no contact rule or limited contact visit the link to learn when you should use the limited contact rule after a breakup.

I hope this post helped and be sure to share this twitter or facebook if you do.

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